Day Two of "Normal" Person Training

Today was yet another day that began at 8 a.m. Hardly incredible, or really worth mentioning to most, but considering there have been many an anxiety-filled, sleepless night, getting UP at 8 a.m., instead of going to sleep, is an accomplishment.



I confess to hitting the snooze alarm. However, my brain, in typical fashion, went right into "spazz" mode and wouldn't allow for indulgent snoozing. I went straight from my bed, to the workout gear, and squeezed a twenty minute weight training session in. For the record, that's my second workout this week. Again, not incredible, but undoing the damage done by months of unemployment hell is going to take some time and patience. Afterwards, I hit the shower, got dressed, grabbed a cup of coffee and went out the door.



My 10:00 a.m. appointment with the local college was today. I haven't been on that campus in about 12 years. I had no idea where I was going, or who I was supposed to see. As soon as I pulled in the drive, I was instantly reminded of the horrors of parking during snowfall on campus. What a serious pain in the ass, and a blatant testament to spatial ignorance! It seems that when it snows, people forget how to park in a neat and orderly fashion. Apparently, their vehicles must be made of some type of highly absorbent material, because they feel it necessary to park four feet away from the vehicles on their left and right. Ahhh. The very SOUR memories of campus life.



Thankfully, my brain still has some memory left, and they have not changed the location of the Student Services office. I found my destination right away. As impressive as that is, to me at least, the rest of my visit left a lot to be desired. When your financial fate lies in the hands of others, you begin to over-analyze the "others" competency levels. The receptionist (who probably got the job I telephone interviewed for) began asking me if I had done this, that, the other thing, filled out that, applied for this. I was beginning to think that I would be turned away due to a lack of correct information, but somehow, I had managed to have everything necessary to allow my passage into a secret office with the Academic Sorcerer.



My Academic counselor, or whatever the correct title used, magically appeared. I was early, and was able to actually get started early. The expression on the woman's face was reminiscent of someone flexing every muscle in their face and neck to prevent the words "I hate fuckin college kids. I hate this stupid office. My support hose are too damn tight. And if the paper in the copy machine gets jammed one more fuckin time, I'm going to staple your eyelids together," from flying out of her mouth in a cheap-coffee fueled rage. I might be exaggerating, but she surely didn't seem friendly. In fact, she never even introduced herself. Come on! That's exactly how I remember my experiences in the advising offices there some 12 years ago. Feeling like you have just ruined some person's day, who, in theory, is supposed to provide you with support and direction. Let's just say my confidence level of this experience being any different is at an exteme low.



My appointment lasted all of about 6 minutes. 6 minutes. And I'm supposed to believe that it took them 5 weeks to find 6 minutes to get my education program started? Sigh. Red tape is a choking hazard. When it's not actually trying to choke me, I feel like choking myself with it. According to the unknown Academic Wizard, I should get word by Monday regarding what happens next.



Afterwards, I headed to the grocery store for a desperately needed trip for food. I had no milk, cereal, eggs, or bread. A few minutes into my trip, I ran into a friend of a friend in the snack aisle. I wasn't shopping for snacks, they have the meat temporarily located in the aisle to the right. The guy is a rep for "Jays" and seems to think I am all that and a bag of chips... sorry, couldn't resist. Too bad the guy is your typical married sleeze, so his 10 minute long charm-fest was a waste of his hormones. He tried to make his ploy to get into my private snack bag a little more honorable by telling me that he married his wife because she was uncomfortable being pregnant and unwed as a teacher. Nice.



I couldn't really afford all of my groceries, but I picked up things that would allow me to make meals out of what I already have, so hopefully this trip will last two months. I had to pay the local grocer's outrageous price for cat food, because it was probably more cost effective than driving across town. I finally swallowed my pride, and put a donation plea on Craig's List for cat food and bird seed, to which my first reply was, "Why don't you feed the birds to the cats. Don't you have a bb gun?" Had I not already known that some smartass would have come up with the same genius answer, I may have found it funny. But when you take a moment to get serious, about seriously humbling shit, having someone make fun of your situation is a tad irritating. I thought of writing some sort of "hope you wind up broke and jobless too" message, but instead chose to reply with, "How sweet of you to say." Sometimes, a manipulative guilt-trip is more thrilling than spewing angry ill will. One very kind woman did reply with advice to contact the Humance Society. Supposedly, they have a food bank for "people like us that are having a tough time." I wrote her back and thanked her for her kindness.



I spoke with Carol "with the longer last name" from the SAC while I was in the dairy aisle. Looks like I'll be meeting with her today, despite feeling an overwhelming need to simply sit on my ass. I'll be leaving here within the half hour.



I have to admit that I do enjoy getting up during the "normal" hours of "normal" people. Enjoying the sunrise... the small hint of importance you feel when you are on the snow-covered road because you actually DO have to be somewhere. And though it could be a week or more, before I have any concrete information as to what I will be doing with my time in the near future, I feel I'll get there... sooner than later. I just have to hope I don't run out of patience first.