I managed to "nap" from some time after 6 p.m. until a few minutes after 8 p.m. I have a non-narcotic muscle relaxer (leftover from my "chostochondritis" episode in June) sitting on the nightstand that I plan to swallow at 10:30 p.m. My phone is on "silent." I am READY to sleep through the night. Here's hoping it works!
Almost broke-down in an exhaustion/depression/anxiety/stress tear-fest at the mechanics today. I was fighting back the desire to just drop to the ground and collapse in tantrum-like ball. To the limit I was. My car has been going through sporadic episodes of not wanting to start. My amateur fix-it brain came to the conclusion that it WASN'T my battery. After a few tests... I was proven right, despite the Harvard Mechanic School graduate's initial assessment. I like being a "guy-stuff" smart girl! It's empowering. The guy was very patient, and respectful. Too bad the shop was backed up and unable to fix it today. I might even escape this "repair" without charge... good thing. I can't afford even an oil change right now.
Fast forward.
I'm home. Mother brings by a few random groceries. Frozen asparagus, frozen french cut green beans, string cheese, and Texas toast. Not sure how she came up with that list... but if I had any say, she would have just come by with a bag of cat food. For the cats, not me. I want it to be clear that I have not gone so far "over the edge" as to begin consuming animal foods. It's very appreciated that she wants to help, but she just doesn't get what an unemployed and financially buried person truly NEEDS.
And neither do my family and friends. At least not most of them. So, I've decided to create a list of tips for those of you who have an unemployed sufferer in your life:
1. DO NOT ask the much hated "Any luck on the job front?" question! Trust me. The whole fuckin world will know when I get a job. (If I survive the initial shock that is.)
2. DO treat them to lunch, or even running errands with you. Unemployed people do not receive the social and mental stimulation of the workplace, and are too broke to do just about anything.
3. DO NOT offer vague suggestions for finding work. They spend their entire day and night searching newspapers and a half-dozen online sites. They know who is and isn't hiring.
4. DO provide specific leads to jobs and help them network if you are able. Simply feeling as though "you've got their back" will do wonders for their state of mind.
5. DO NOT assume that they are doing something wrong, or not looking for work; especially, in a state with the highest unemployment rate! My unemployment office had 8 positions open in a local factory, and 1,500 people applied. That's a .005% chance of getting hired.
6. DO offer to review their resumes and cover letters if they need help with them, or are looking for another opinion.
7. DO NOT expect your unemployed pal to be joyous and carefree... like they are on an extended vacation. Being out of work is HELL! People who have worked their entire lives did so not just because of money. Think about all of the people you know who retire and then return to work shortly after.
8. DO call them when you are at the store if you feel like donating food. Ask them what they NEED! A bag of chocolates is less appreciated when you need a slice of bread.
9. DO NOT tell them ways to cut costs that involve spending money! They don't have any!
10. DO be patient. The stress, anxiety, fear, and rejection bears a heavy weight on the mind of the unemployed. They are struggling to get through each day, and are likely to have mood swings.
And for those who haven't had the misfortune to be unemployed, here's a little peek inside the mind of someone who's been living this nightmare for six months:
I have not slept peacefully for more than one day in a row in over 5 months. And when I can't sleep, I fire up the computer and send resumes at 3 a.m.
I feel more likely to get my identity stolen then I do to get a job.
Sometimes I feel worthless, despite knowing I am a hard-working, talented and intelligent individual.
I am in never-ending fear of going deep into debt. Been there, done that, and it isn't a happy place.
Every time the heat comes on (my thermostat is set at 60), I cringe.
Every time I turn a light on, I wonder if I'll be able to pay my electric bill.
I have "all the time in the world" in a world with no time. It's lonely here.
Sending out resumes and cover letters is expensive, and at times, feels pointless.
Even "strong" people feel weak and discouraged some times. Support without condition is always welcome.
Believing in yourself has no bearing on the unemployment rate.
I'm stressed out! Too tired to pretend everything is coming up roses, when it's really falling down like leaves.
Almost broke-down in an exhaustion/depression/anxiety/stress tear-fest at the mechanics today. I was fighting back the desire to just drop to the ground and collapse in tantrum-like ball. To the limit I was. My car has been going through sporadic episodes of not wanting to start. My amateur fix-it brain came to the conclusion that it WASN'T my battery. After a few tests... I was proven right, despite the Harvard Mechanic School graduate's initial assessment. I like being a "guy-stuff" smart girl! It's empowering. The guy was very patient, and respectful. Too bad the shop was backed up and unable to fix it today. I might even escape this "repair" without charge... good thing. I can't afford even an oil change right now.
Fast forward.
I'm home. Mother brings by a few random groceries. Frozen asparagus, frozen french cut green beans, string cheese, and Texas toast. Not sure how she came up with that list... but if I had any say, she would have just come by with a bag of cat food. For the cats, not me. I want it to be clear that I have not gone so far "over the edge" as to begin consuming animal foods. It's very appreciated that she wants to help, but she just doesn't get what an unemployed and financially buried person truly NEEDS.
And neither do my family and friends. At least not most of them. So, I've decided to create a list of tips for those of you who have an unemployed sufferer in your life:
1. DO NOT ask the much hated "Any luck on the job front?" question! Trust me. The whole fuckin world will know when I get a job. (If I survive the initial shock that is.)
2. DO treat them to lunch, or even running errands with you. Unemployed people do not receive the social and mental stimulation of the workplace, and are too broke to do just about anything.
3. DO NOT offer vague suggestions for finding work. They spend their entire day and night searching newspapers and a half-dozen online sites. They know who is and isn't hiring.
4. DO provide specific leads to jobs and help them network if you are able. Simply feeling as though "you've got their back" will do wonders for their state of mind.
5. DO NOT assume that they are doing something wrong, or not looking for work; especially, in a state with the highest unemployment rate! My unemployment office had 8 positions open in a local factory, and 1,500 people applied. That's a .005% chance of getting hired.
6. DO offer to review their resumes and cover letters if they need help with them, or are looking for another opinion.
7. DO NOT expect your unemployed pal to be joyous and carefree... like they are on an extended vacation. Being out of work is HELL! People who have worked their entire lives did so not just because of money. Think about all of the people you know who retire and then return to work shortly after.
8. DO call them when you are at the store if you feel like donating food. Ask them what they NEED! A bag of chocolates is less appreciated when you need a slice of bread.
9. DO NOT tell them ways to cut costs that involve spending money! They don't have any!
10. DO be patient. The stress, anxiety, fear, and rejection bears a heavy weight on the mind of the unemployed. They are struggling to get through each day, and are likely to have mood swings.
And for those who haven't had the misfortune to be unemployed, here's a little peek inside the mind of someone who's been living this nightmare for six months:
I have not slept peacefully for more than one day in a row in over 5 months. And when I can't sleep, I fire up the computer and send resumes at 3 a.m.
I feel more likely to get my identity stolen then I do to get a job.
Sometimes I feel worthless, despite knowing I am a hard-working, talented and intelligent individual.
I am in never-ending fear of going deep into debt. Been there, done that, and it isn't a happy place.
Every time the heat comes on (my thermostat is set at 60), I cringe.
Every time I turn a light on, I wonder if I'll be able to pay my electric bill.
I have "all the time in the world" in a world with no time. It's lonely here.
Sending out resumes and cover letters is expensive, and at times, feels pointless.
Even "strong" people feel weak and discouraged some times. Support without condition is always welcome.
Believing in yourself has no bearing on the unemployment rate.
I'm stressed out! Too tired to pretend everything is coming up roses, when it's really falling down like leaves.
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