The Cold War

Poverty sucks! It is literally a cold-hearted condition! In an attempt to keep the bills I'm already having trouble paying from getting any higher... I've resorted to using some space heaters to keep the house slightly above freezing. Well, they aren't very effective. My outfit sure is "HOT" though: full-length wool socks, sweatpants, a long-sleeve T, short-sleeve T, and a hooded sweatshirt. All in various "uplifting" shades of gray.

Sleeping has been difficult the past few days. Only caught an hour Sunday before I cleaned an entire house on an empty stomach. So today was a waste, unless I was registered for the Guinness Book of World Records most sleep in one day title. I did write up a "schedule" for myself last night. Something to make me feel a little more purposeful and directed.

I'm into my seventh month of this... and it is shear hell. I hate it. You are fighting to pay your bills. Fighting to hang on to your pride. Fighting to live with purpose. Fighting to keep your "chin up." Fighting to find a job. Fighting the urge to give up. Fighting to keep warm. Fighting to get out of bed...

I did pick up the guitar tonight. Strummed the G chord a bit. My fingers went into the proper position much easier than yesterday! Looked up some other chords on the computer, but didn't find anything I felt I could learn without picking up potential mistakes. Can't be a bad thing to get used to the feel of handling the guitar and strumming it. I played around with lifting and replacing my fingers while strumming. I'll surely have at least one more supervised lesson this week. I have two chairs in the garage I was going to sell for cash, but, my friend made a comment that my empty upstairs bedroom would make a good "jam room." Maybe I'll keep them for now and haul them up there.

I'll be back in the unemployment office on Thursday to check the status of my extension paperwork. I'm hoping to be able to meet with the case worker in charge of the "OJT" program. I don't have time to worry about tuition and more schooling. I NEED a job. Yesterday!